What did we do last night that was yellow?
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
Randomize
