Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
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