Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
My bed smells like the plague
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
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