Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
