So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Randomize
