super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
Randomize
