you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Randomize