Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
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