Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Randomize
