her vagine was all disorganized.
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
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I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
We were destined to go to rehab together
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
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