Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
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I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Randomize