Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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