Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
Randomize