thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
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