They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Randomize
