at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
Randomize
