He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Randomize
