Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
Randomize
