haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
porn star boner night. come get it.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
