I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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