you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
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