Yo dont text me then not text me
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize
