don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
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