im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
I currently don't understand fingers.
Randomize
