Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
the night ended with taco bell and tears
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
Randomize