i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
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