We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
