if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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