Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
Randomize
