I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
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