He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
Randomize
