The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
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