You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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