so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
love makes seman taste better
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
Randomize
