Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
Randomize
