No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
Randomize