And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
Randomize
