i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
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