I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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