just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
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