That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Randomize
