do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
I woke up this morning to the buzzer on my oven going off... I cooked fish sticks at 425 degrees for 5 hours last night. my house smells awesome
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
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