I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
