now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize