another moral hangover. fuck.
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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