we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
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