You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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