Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I make it through this whole bridesmaid process without anyone knowing that I actually hate everyone but the bride, including the groom, I deserve a complimentary bottle of vodka.
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
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