too bad you live with your parents still
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
Randomize
