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Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
Randomize
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