Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize
